Down the memory lane, it was the month of March in 1983. Mahashivratri Parv had just been celebrated and spring was in full bloom. It was the time that fills the human soul with yearning and nurtures the profoundest of spiritual passions which intoxicates man’s very being. After a day long struggle with life, hordes of impassioned shishyas yearned to gaze in awe at the radiant, blissful vision of their spiritual father. Curious to know about His whereabouts, shishyas would make frantic calls to each other and impatiently waited for news about Him. Our state of mind could be summed up as:
Aashiki sabr talab and tamanna betaab, dil ka kya rang karoon khooney jigar hone tak.
By touching His lotus feet and meeting the benign glance of Param Pujya Guruji, our hearts were overwhelmed with a sense of ineffable closeness to His grace; as if our parched souls had been cleansed in the bliss of the holy Ganga. I often prayed for time to stop right there so that I could continue to dive into the ocean of that bliss for an unending period of time.
Some shishyas asked for solutions to their domestic or worldly problems, while others were interested in spiritual enlightenment. Param Pujya Guruji patiently heard them. Very calmly and simply, he resolved their problems and satisfied the curiosity of everyone.
For a long time, I had ardently desired to have darshan of Pujya Guruji’s birth place. On one fine evening of March 1983, when I went to Gurgaon, Guruji gracefully reclined in his bed room while directing some Gurubhais to organize a special function. I touched His lotus feet and sat near him after seeking his blessings and learned that a function was being organized to install idols in Sheetla Mata Mandir in Hariana (Pujya Guruji’s birth place). Guruji was telling the Shishyas to start for Hariana early next morning. I was delighted to know this programme and, in my heart of hearts, I felt that the time had come to realize my dream to visit Guruji’s birth place.
Addressing us, Guruji said: “Kapoor Sahib (Late Shri K.C. Kapoor, who was Senior Superintendent of Police, Haryana at that time and was Guruji’s shishya), rath yatra will be taken from such and such route with great pomp and show. The idols will be kept in a well-decorated chariot and Malhotraji (Guruji’s foremost shishya) along with other honoured shishyas will be seated in the chariot. All of you should leave in a convoy next morning between 2.00 A.M. to 3.00 A.M. so that most of the distance can be covered while it is cool and heavy traffic can also be avoided.
“So, mein tulsi tere aangan ki (addressing Shri F.C. Sharmaji) keep yourself ready to leave in time. You also Motey, (now addressing Late Shri R.P. Sharmaji) come back tomorrow morning in time. Raje (Shri Raj Paul Sekhri) and Seetu (Late Shri Sita Ram Takhi), jao putt aur time te aa jana (go my sons and come back in time.)”
As Guruji was giving instructions to shishyas one by one, my eyes were glued to him as I anxiously awaited my name to be pronounced. As time passed, my heart beat also increased. It was late in the evening and I was anxiously waiting for his instructions to accompany the group. One by one, Gurubhais took leave of Guruji to return early next morning. It was 10.30 at night when I willy-nilly ventured to seek Guruji’s permission to leave for home. Very lovingly, he said, “haan putt (yes, my son) you should leave now. It is quite late and you will take at least an hour to reach home. Drive slowly and carefully. The road is not very good and there are many pits en route. The traffic of trucks would also have started by now. With full head lights on, they have a tendency to blind to the drivers coming from the opposite direction. So, drive carefully.”
I took His permission to leave, but was feeling very sad. During the entire journey back home I kept brooding – what was the harm if Guruji had asked me also to go to Hariana and participate in the idol installation ceremony. On the one hand, he proudly announces that I am one of his navratnas and a very dear son; but when the time came, he did not fulfil my most ardent desire. Why? What was my shortcoming for thus being ignored? In such a state of mind, I reached home at about 11.30 P.M. with a very heavy heart. Prabha (my wife) asked me what had delayed me for so long and offered to bring food. I told her that I have had my food and as it is quite late, she should go to sleep.
I changed my clothes and lay down on the bed. As per daily practice before going to sleep, I started inward recitation of mantras, but could not concentrate on paath as my mind dwelled over the evening episode. Time and again, I prayed at the lotus feet of my Guruji that had He fulfilled my wish, I would also have been much happier. But I felt dejected and depressed and wondered if He understood my heartache.
Lost in such thoughts, I do not know when I fell asleep or entered into a state of meditation. Early in the morning, between 3.00 to 4.00 A.M. when I became conscious, I had the strongest impression that the entire night I was in Hariana. Since I had never had an opportunity to visit Guruji’s birth place, it was difficult for me to say definitely whether I had actually had darshan of Guruji’s birth place. However, I made a rough sketch of the place I had glimpsed in my trance. As soon as I reached my office, I called Gaggu (Guruji’s nephew, Shri Gopal Sharma, who used to work in my office) and showed him the rough layout I had prepared and asked him, “can you figure out from this sketch as to which place this is?” Instantly, he answered, “yes, this is Guruji’s birth place in Hariana”. I was ecstatic when I heard this; my happiness knew no bounds. I mentally prostrated (dandvat pranaam) myself at the lotus feet of my Gurupita and marveled at His unique ways to fulfill the desires of his shishyas. I surrendered myself totally to Him and profusely apologized for the negative feelings I had nursed since last evening.
Later that day, I had to attend a very urgent and an important meeting. Had I not been in Delhi, I would have experienced a tremendous loss of business. Obviously, this was His reason for not sending me to Hariana in my physical form and organizing that happy journey in my subtle form (suksham shareer).
At the lotus feet of such a benevolent and revered Gurupita, I bow my head and offer hundreds and thousands salutations.
Tasmaye Shree Guruve Namah